recurring dream...

i have this recurring dream. while the scenery changes a bit each time, it's basically the same concept, same people, same setting. and it always feels so life-like when i'm sleeping that i don't think to wake myself up from it.

i'm sitting in our highschool auditorium, during our musical theatre production. i'm in the audience. and it occurs to me that they're starting *my* song - the one i'm supposed to sing. i've missed my cue.

so i get up, pretending it's part of the act, and i head for the stage as i start singing... but i don't know all the words. it's not like i've forgotten them, it's like i never bothered to learn them. so the spotlight is on me. i'm wearing a black dress, in costume, and it occurs to me that i'm not singing all that well... i'm kind of in my 'singing along to the radio' voice, certainly not my performance voice.

this happens a few times in the dream. different songs, or different shows, but each time, i miss my cue and i feel embarrassed when the song starts without me. and then i try to catch up by heading for the stage, the spotlight hits me and i sing, but i don't know the words.

i'm sure you could spend some time philosophizing about the meaning of this dream. perhaps my subconscious feels like i have no idea what i'm doing in life, that i'm missing the point. or maybe i just miss musical theatre. hahaha. it's hard to say.

the other weird dream i had last night was somewhat related. somewhat.

i'm back in highschool, and a friend of mine - john - has just broken his mom's clothes washer by immersing it in water or something... (how? i dunno!) so they replace it, and as one would expect, she's rather flustered by the amount of money it costs for a new washer. but then, i'm alone, standing at the edge of a pond, and the new washer is in the back of their station-wagon (again, how? i dunno!) and it falls on me, pushing me into the water and catching on my foot. it's falling to the bottom of the pond, and taking me with it, and it's all i can do to get my cell phone to work. i call john and while trying to get him to understand what's happening, that i need help, all i can say is "pond. pond."

i really have no idea where this one came from. it was weird to have john suddenly pop up in a dream - i haven't seen him since the day of our highschool graduation, and except for the occasional updates i get from miscellaneous old friends i run into, i haven't heard much about him. his presence in my dream may have been spurred by the fact that i drove by his ex-girlfriend's grandparent's house last night and saw her car parked there, but what a strange jump.

ok, that's it for me. feel free to analyze my dreams or tell me i'm just flat out crazy. :)